My mind is a cluster of a million thoughts lately. As of December 12th, 2014 I have become unemployed after nearly 9 years. I am doing my best to enjoy the time off but its just not me to be one to stay home and sit around. I am going to try and make the best of it. Do all the things I could not do. Or made excuse not to do because of work. I slowly starting to feel inspired again. Writing is coming to me in small spurts. I feeling creative urges to draw and paint. Things I haven't picked up in a really long time. When one door closes another opens, So I have been told. I think its for the best to focus on myself and the growth I need as a writer. Trying not to worry about what the future will bring and take things one day at a time.
For the first time I was home for a normal holiday. I didnt have to work crazy hours for Thanksgiving or black friday. I didn't have to work on Christmas Eve and try to cram everything in on Christmas day between two families. It was really laid back and I felt really blessed. I got to spend quality time with my nephews. Its amazing to see how much they change every year. They are growing way to fast. At least with having nephews I am not missing out on having kids of my own. I always have known I didn't want any. But I go through moments where I rethink that decision. I guess the door is always open.
Even though I had a beautiful Christmas. My heart couldnt help to notice the things that were missing . The passing of a dear friend this year and the loss of a friendship I feel will never be regained. My heart aches for both. Time doesn't always heal all wounds. You just kinda learn to live with the scars. I miss my friend.
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